Header
bunch of sensitive southern pansies

Ninty Switch - er...

Disclaimer: The following is written by an opinionated oaf and should not be taken particularly seriously. If you get offended, it's your own fault for reading it and taking shit seriously. No facts were considered, opinions withheld, spelling checked, and certainly no proof reading occured. Read at your own risk.
also known as Why I'm getting a Nintendo Switch but don't think anyone should at the moment.
 
I rarely comment on the games industry these days, because, well, who cares what I think. I'm ignored the PS4 Pro (though I may get one for Wipeout) and the Scorpio (I still have zero confidence in MS).
 
With the recently confirmed Nintendo Switch information, though, I thought I'd give my opinion.
 
Firstly, yes I am getting one. If I were looking to get one now, after the Nintendo reveal, well I wouldn't consider it. I am getting one because some stage last year a website called GameSeek allowed you to pre-order the Switch for £199 with a price guarantee. No-one knew the price then, and I was not alone in thinking that would be the high end. I was expecting the machine to come in at less. But I decided to take a punt at GameSeek "Just in case" and was then amused to see that they even took pre-payment. GameSeek have confirmed everyone who pre-ordered would indeed get their machine at £199, so I guess I got a bargain, in a sense. GameSeek do not have the best customer service record out there, so there's still a chance they'll stall, or drag it out ("We don't have enough to cover pre-orders" type of thing), so we'll see. I understand they only have a thousand pre-orders though, which isn't a great number, though it will end up costing them a fortune. And fairplay to them if they stick to their promise.
 
So yeah, I'm getting one for that reason.
 
What do I think of the console announcement itself? I'm not impressed.
 
Good things first - I like the idea of there only being one Ninty machine. No home-console, no hand-held, just one machine that does both. Great idea. The tablet screen looks nice from what I've seen, resolution is fine (despite what "but my smarthpone has a 4k screen!" people say, they really don't understand how games work). From what I gather, going by it's Nintendo and they don't really talk specs, it seems to be about twice as powerful as the Wii U, so we're getting a portable Wii U.
 
From a hand-held gaming perspective, that's GREAT.
 
For a home console, I think it's pretty shit though. Specs would seem to put it at maybe 40% of the XBone power, which was already underpowered compared to the PS4, let alone the Pro. I guess that makes the Pro like 10 times more powerful? That's ridiculous. I expected the hand-held mode to come in where it is, but thought when docked the Switch would power on with a fan and up the core speeds significantly, hitting maybe 1 terraflop. This doesn't seem to be the case at all.
 
What this all means is a whole load of sub 1080p games on your TV, I expect 900p to become standard on most Switch titles. There's not enough of a power boost going handheld to docked to have 720p on the screen and then 1080p on your TV. Which is alarming in 2017.
 
The games announced.... look it is Nintendo, you get what you expect. New Zelda (at launch, but it's a Wii U title at heart), New Mario (late 2017, looks good like Maro 64 playground but the New York stuff was..... disconcerting), Splatoon 2 in the summer, and a half hearted Mario Kart 8 conversion a month or so after launch. No new race tracks over the Wii U version, but a proper battlemode - something tragically fucked up in the Wii U version. I always like the idea of a Mario Kart game more than I like playing them. It's a bit of a mantra round mine that within 2 minutes of playing a Mario Kart game I'll announce "Bloody Mario Kart" when I am lamely hit up the arse by a series of shells.
 
But I digress....
 
The software list is poor. 5 launch titles, one of which (1 2 Switch) I'm not sure you even need a screen for. See, it's mainly a tech demo of the new controllers Nintendo has produced. At best it should be a pack-in with the console, but no, you have to buy it. 
 
So I think it's launching in total with Zelda: Breath of the Wild, 1-2 Switch, Super Bomberman R, Skylanders Imaginators and Just Dance 2017. £60 for Bomberman (!!!!!); I'd pay £20 max. Skylander we have for the PS4. So there's really only Zelda for launch. 
 
And Nintendo have really fucked up the pricing. Console is £279 I believe. With 32gb of storage space. A PS4 with a game or two costs £50 less. A PS4 Pro costs £70 more. It's crazy.
 
Games seems ridiculously expensive, with £60 RRP - the trouble being Ninty published titles never really drop in price. I guess that means you can buy at launch knowing there's no point in waiting, but I am convinced that in part if why the Wii U failed. Console gamers are used to getting things half price within a few months. I rarely buy at launch these days. I mean, even though I've sold my Wii U, I still look out for cheap Wii U games to run on CEMU, but I guess until stores close out the range to move on to the Switch, I'm waiting.
 
Accessories are expensive. A dock, which would be useful to have a few spare ones at home in various rooms on various TVs, is £90. All it is, from what I can see, is an AC adaptor, and a plastic dock with USB-C and HDMI. The price is horrendous for what it is. A Pro Controller is £65! Yes all first part controllers are expensive, but this is £20 more than I imagined. If you want another "set" of Switch controllers, which after all only amount to one fullsize normal controller, that's £75. And I'm pretty sure that doesn't include the "link" in the middle to join them. Which is £15. Or £30 if you want one which can charge the controller / have it plugged in charging while you play.
 
Yep, the standard Switch controllers have to be docked to be charged or you need to buy an accessory. They may have a stated battery life of 20 hours, but this is a console at home as well as on the move. You should get, as standard, the kit needed to charge the controllers when being used as a traditional controller while you are playing the machine on the TV.
 
Battery life on the Switch is 2.5 to 6 hours, so you're looking at the low end when gaming on it.
 
Oh, an Nintendo now want you to pay to play online. Fuck MS for starting this shit and fuck Sony for following. Of course Ninty now want a piece. This basically renders Splatoon worthless without subscribing, and really, you shouldn't have to pay a tax to play that and Mario Kart online. Because really, that's all Nintendo can offer online. The machine is too underpowered to expect third parties to port over their big titles. Which I guess leaves the Switch like the Wii U - no really third party support, you just buy it to have access to Nintendo software.
 
I'm not impressed as you can tell. Still, I always get a kick out of the latest Mario games, and a Nintendo console keeps me ticking over until they are emulated and I can up-render them on a PC Smile